Opt Weekly

Vaccinations Hit the Ground Running

For once the HCM-BuyLine® was not mentioned in this week’s Wealth Watch. As precedents go we’ll assume no news is good news. However, as far as NEWS news goes, there is some new news. Are you cross eyed yet? Great. 

A new fragrance hit the market and it’s called, “Overtime.” It’s designed by Corporate America trapped on a yacht named Pandemic and she stalls like a dream. Ever since Overtime hit the pharmaceutical market, homies are getting vaccinated faster than you can say, “Let’s party.” 

President Biden is pushing manufacturers to sneeze out COVID-19 vaccinations like a hypochondriac trapped in ragweed. If Johnson & Johnson walked into a closet, we’re assuming the president just locked the door and threw away the key. He wants 100 million vaccinations out the door by spring. Merck also somehow squeezed themselves in J&J territory donned in PPE and a little embarrassment of kind of messing up their first attempt. 

It’s okay Merck. Every procrastinator earns an A at some point. 

Who Clicked Add to Cart?

Everyone. Literally everyone. The ISM manufacturing index increased to 60.8 in February. We haven’t seen these kinds of numbers since May 2004. If our math is correct that would mean 17 years have passed since the ISM was impressed. All we know is 2020 was the year every bored aunt was unleashed on the interwebs and they have their credit card numbers memorized. 

Who’s Reaping the Benefits? 

Target is rolling in the dough at the moment as their sales jumped 20% last year. In one year Target grew around $15 billion. Which is the same amount Target’s made in 11 years. You’re going to want to sit down for this next part. Stores such as Target, Apple, and Ulta are headed toward “mall” status as they all have stores inside of stores. The only thing left to add is a coffee bar and a thespian barista wearing Overtime. 

So here’s the real tickle. If Target, Apple and Ulta are all part of the same complex… these “malls” are simply… a mall. 

Let’s pause to giggle at the irony. 

Okay giggle over. 

Vaccinations gain Traction while Vicky Variant Was Caught Sleeping Through Her Alarm

Well the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, folks. First we couldn’t get Colonel Coronavirus out of the neighbor’s prized hydrangeas and now Vicky can’t wake up for work. Maybe is genetics, maybe it’s dumb luck. All we know is if this virus team can’t get their act together then the Vaccination Station Wagon might just run them over. And Vicky Variant might be the one entity we don’t mind napping on the job. 

Until next time, we’re staying Optimiztic.


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